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I'm going to be going back to Nevada in a few days. This means I'll have to return to a normal life where I won't have most of my meals cooked for me, I'll have to do the dishes, my dog will have to be walked (I will miss just letting her out to romp on my mother's five acres), and of course, school next month. I have been very lucky that my mom has been so supportive and such a big help during my recovery. Part of me doesn't want to leave, but I'm bored. I personally consider boredom to be a good sign since it means I'm feeling well enough to be somewhere other than in my bed watching tv. My stamina is ridiculously low and I figure it will take a long time to build it up. That task is daunting and I'm not sure what my future looks like. When I was sick I thought getting out of pain was my whole battle, but I was wrong. There are emotional/psychological issues that I need to deal with now that I can.

I finally got my stimulator programmed correctly. I told my rep that I was unhappy with Mike, the rep that was at my revision surgery so she met me at my general practitioner's office. Turns out Mike did not change the programming at all after my stimulator was repaired, despite the fact that I told him before and after the surgery that it needed to be fixed. It frustrates me I was in pain for a week and a half longer than I needed to be, yet there is nothing I can do about it now.

I went to my post-op on Thursday with my neurosurgeon. He took the time to answer every question I had which I really needed. I wanted to know if I am able to get pregnant and have a fairly normal pregnancy with the stimulator (though I absolutely am not planning on children for years) and he said I should be fine. I asked him if I'm going to run into an problems with the battery pack moving if I lose weight. He said it might shift depending on how much I lose and I may need a revision at that point. I've been having some shoulder pain caused by the tight wires in my neck and he suggested physical therapy before it heals. I feel more confident about it all now and I'm ready to be done with doctors for a while.

My stimulator is still giving me great pain relief. It seems I get some soreness if it's turned up too high just because the wires are in a very sensitive area. I get frustrated with it all sometimes though. It's not that the sensation is annoying, it just gets frustrating to need it so often. I am hoping with time I will be able to use it less and less.